I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, but maybe it’s time for a serious vacation. Not just going somewhere, but taking a vacation from the online world because I am really starting to get sick of it.

So let me blather on about that for a bit.

I don’t know that this really requires a lot of setup, but here we go anyhow. Last year, my wife and I were going to go on a nice vacation. We were going to an event, but a week before we were supposed to leave, the event got cancelled and we had nowhere to go. No vacation last year. We didn’t even take any serious time off. This year, we’re trying to figure out what we want to do in the summer and while we have some ideas, we haven’t set any real goals yet. We both have tons of vacation time available. I get a month of paid time off a year because I’ve been there so long, but I can’t remember the last time that I took more than a couple of days a year. I just get a big check once I’ve maxed my vacation time and it all starts over.

Last night, we were out at dinner and we talked about it and that’s really what got me thinking about this. It’s been in the back of my mind for a very, very long time and for anyone who has read the blog for any amount of time will know, I’ve been unhappy with social media, pretty much forever. It’s filled with idiots and I am ever so sick of idiots.

It just so happens that by the time anyone reads this, we’re going to be gone for the weekend. If anyone posts anything, I’m not going to be here to read it, fair warning. It’s going to be some time away from the grind, just to have some fun. Then I come back to people saying dumb stuff and not caring at all about the truth. I never look forward to that.

I go through cycles of “I can tolerate it… I can tolerate it… I can… I can… no, I just can’t anymore” and that’s where I am right now. I am very burned out, not on the stuff that I enjoy doing, but all of the stuff that’s associated with it. Reddit sucks, Facebook sucks, most of YouTube sucks. Unfortunately, I do tend to have a fair bit of down time at work and on weekends and while I’m sitting at my desk, waiting for someone to finish up or something to happen so I can get back to work, I’ll jump over to social media because it’s easy to walk away from. I could just read a book or watch a movie, but those are much harder to leave at a moment’s notice Social media is much easier to deal with in small batches and then forget about it when something more important comes along.

Like I said though, I’ve just walked away from social media multiple times. I’ve deleted accounts. I’ve said “never again”, but then I get bored because I have nothing quick to do, but I always go back, saying “this time will be different” but it never, ever is. It’s always the same dumb people, saying the same dumb stuff, although there are a few bright spots here and there, but mostly, I want to claw my eyes out at the abject stupidity. Sooner or later, I either have to walk away, at least for a while, or I will go insane.

That doesn’t mean that I’m going to stop making videos for YouTube. I have a tremendous backlog, I could just vanish for a couple of months and nobody would ever know I was gone, but I have a commitment and even though the burnout is real there too, I can handle it. I really wish there was a way that I wasn’t saying the same things over and over and over with every theist video because that’s how it feels. That’s how it’s felt for a very long time. Their arguments never change and they will never learn anything or alter their beliefs, so who cares how many times I do it, I’m just wasting my time. That’s also how I’m feeling. I am not making a difference, although I went into this knowing that I wouldn’t. I can count the number of productive, intelligent conversations that I’ve had with the religious in the past year on, maybe, 2 fingers. There’s really no point in it, I think.

But aren’t I doing it for other people? Sure, you can make that argument, although the vast majority of people who come to the channel, they’re already atheists. They’re not learning anything, they’re not changing their minds, they aren’t deciding to evaluate their faith intellectually and with evidence aforethought.  It’s not a ton of fun, although there are the occasional good conversations, but as I said, I can handle it and keep it going for the foreseeable future, even though I acknowledge that it’s largely a waste of time.

Could I branch out into other things like I once did? Maybe, but I don’t think it’s going to help there either because I find people across the board dumb and dishonest. Most people today, not all certainly, but most people are incapable of having intelligent discussions or justifying their own beliefs because they don’t want to. If it feels good, they believe it, actual truth be damned.

So where does that leave us? I honestly don’t know. I’m uploading all of my weekly videos today, on Friday, and then, I’m turning it all off. I’m walking away and I’ll see how I feel on Monday when I get back. Anyone who wants to respond to anything, feel free, with the understanding that I am not going to be as available as I try to be otherwise. This summer, I am going to take at least a week, probably two away. There’s a story behind that, but it’s not really important. I might take more time before that. I haven’t really taken a vacation from the channel since I started it. I’ve always made sure that the videos kept flowing, even if I wasn’t here. That might change, or it might not. It depends on how I end up feeling.

Unfortunately, the channel has never gone where I wanted it to, not that I really cared because I wasn’t in it for the money, but it’s grown really slowly and that’s why I’m feeling like I’m not going anywhere. That’s another issue for another time though and I know that because I don’t go out and actively promote it, it’s not going to get huge, and I don’t care about that, but… well, that’s a subject for another time, I suppose.

Anyhow, that’s what’s going on. I’m already gone and won’t be back until Monday. I am not even going to look at my phone the whole time I am gone, at least for social media. Hope everyone has a good weekend. I hope I will too.