Equality Takes a Bitch-Slap

beating-wifeI ran into an interesting feminist discussion today and I think it shows exactly where the minds of a lot of feminists are.  Someone asked if, in the modern age of equality, if a woman slapped a man, would it be appropriate for the man to slap her back.  The same goes for punches, kicks, etc.  Power for power, force for force, equal across the board.  Tons of men were saying that no, there is simply no reason a man should ever hit a woman, but I, nasty person that I am, had to pipe up and ask why.  If women want to be truly equal to men, shouldn’t they take the good with the bad?  I asked if there was one justification, aside from tradition, that anyone could give me that would logically make this position valid.

Then the feminists started chiming in.  They couldn’t give me a single excuse, outside of being a cultural or traditional taboo, why men shouldn’t hit women.  They claimed that said taboo was still valid and should remain so.  I pointed out that, traditionally, women didn’t have equal rights to men and if one tradition is valid, why not all of them?  They mulled that one over for a while, but then came back with “feminism is just about equal wages!”

Bullshit.  Equality is about equality.  If women want to be equal to men, and I wholly advocate that they ought to be, it needs to be equality across the board.  Sure, there are a very few factors, based on different biologies, that need to be taken into account, but for the most part, if a man can do it and a woman can do it, then they both ought to be expected to do it.  Lots of feminists want all the good, they want all of the equality when it comes to wages and promotions and benefits, but where women have had standing over men, they don’t want to lose any of that.  They don’t want to have to sign up for the draft.  They don’t want to lose their superior position when it comes to child custody or spousal support.  They don’t want to serve the same prison sentences that men do for equivalent crimes.  They want their cake and want to eat it too.

Some of them are even honest about it, even if they try to pass it off as a joke.  One woman popped up and said women don’t want to be equal, they  want to be superior.  I think that’s more true than most feminists are willing to admit.

Now I don’t advocate that anyone go around hitting anyone, this is a purely theoretical exercise, it is one though that has a troubling conclusion.  I fear that a lot of men who have been raised with a particular gentlemanly bent, who have been trained since childhood that women are to be placed on a pedestal may very well get that chivalrous belief abused by some women who are only too happy to pretend that give and take consists only of take.

6 thoughts on “Equality Takes a Bitch-Slap”

  1. Hi Cephus! Yes, I occasionally read your blog. 🙂 I'd like to add my voice to this discussion, if you don't mind.

    I think your friends are wrong. First off, it's wrong to hit someone out of anger, period, end of story. I don't care if it's a child hitting a child, a man hitting a woman, or a woman hitting a man- it's wrong. There are better ways of dealing with anger than striking out. Self-defense is another issue- if, for example, a woman were hitting a man and he felt he had no choice other than to hit her back in order to stop her or to escape, I would see that as self-defense. It's still not ideal, obviously, as nothing *good* can ever come of violence, but when backed in to a corner it is a natural and sometimes necessary human response to danger.

    So to your question of "is there a reason other than tradition as to why a man shouldn't hit a woman" it is just that – violence is always wrong.

    I also agree with you that equality is equality, and that lots of women who like to say "I'm a feminist" aren't *really* promoting equality when it means they have to give up some of their traditional female privilege. Women should have to register for the draft. Women should pay for themselves on dates. Women should work and contribute to the family income. Women should not automatically get alimony or child custody or the house in a divorce. And yes, the law should be applied equally whether the defendant is a man or a woman. A crime isn't any less heinous because it was committed by a woman.

    You can rest assured that there are many feminists out there who agree with you on this, and if I had been at that discussion I would have been quite happy to take your friends to task on their exploitation of female privilege. 🙂

    Actually, women like that piss me off because they are doing no real good with their half-assed feminism, and are actually contributing to the trope of the straw feminist.

    1. I happen to agree with you entirely. Equality is equality, you don't get to pick and choose what parts you want to be equal. That's why gay marriage is important. If we're going to have equality across the board, then everyone ought to have the same equal rights and equal responsibilities. The idea that some people are more equal than others is just absurd.

  2. Hello Cephus,

    Happened by your blog , the subject has been something that I too have wondered about and I feel the same way as you do , there is a general feeling that a woman can get away with slapping a man without him doing anything back , where did that come from? partially from all those movies and tv shows( too many examples ….one that struck me as I type this , is from a late 90's movie ' lake placid ' when the lead female character slaps a sheriff for startling her by pulling a half eaten moose from the river into the boat they were in ).

    There is yet another dimension to all this , women have been progressively assertive and aggressive , ably assisted by the popular media and many feminist movements that term women being shrill and angry as ' strong' , growing girls today have all the support from societal institutions in helping them grow to strong , confident individuals , but the same is not the case with boys.

    In the old days boys had a clear idea of what the society expected out of them in the model of masculinity, every nation had it's set of masculine traits , in general they all shared the same attributes of strength, toughness, adventure seeking spirit , devil may care attitude , dominance and authority.

    In a changing world where these masculine traits have been the butt of constant criticism and ridicule ( although the same traits in a female is seen with a completely different eye) , the boys have lost out on a clear model of what to grow up into , while the girls are clear they can be shrill and loud and be called ' fiery' or ' assertive' , the same behavior from a boy would earn him the title of an 'asshole'. This confuses the child , and today's world sees a generation of boys who arent sure what they are to grow up into.

    Here in India things are getting progressively worse , here most women take their special status for granted and the government with an eye on the female vote bank has been indulging them with one special concession after another , 45% of all public transport bus seats are reserved for women , there was an example of the heights of absurdity in government dispensations when the state government of a southern state shifted the reserved ladie's seats from the front of the bus to the rear – the reason?- because it was ascertained that the front seats are more prone to damage in event of an accident , I guess it didnt bother the government much that the guys would be getting killed instead of the special seat occupying ladies in the rear.

    It gets worse , there is a moment on for reserving 33% of all seats in the parliament for women (the equal in USA would be that 33% of senators being women just because they are women).

    Gender should never be a consideration in assessing individual worth or ability , it shouldn't be supported by law or intended lawful promulgation in any society that values equality in it's true essence.

    I like the below quotation by Eleanor Roosevelt ,squarely aiming the individual rather than the gender –

    " Dont ever call a woman a bitch, call her an asshole , you will still get your point across , and it's not sexist".

    1. Lots of fantastic points here, Shivan, thanks for commenting! I think we're on the same wavelength here, there are a lot of things that women get away with, just because they are women, that men could never do without being called sexist and misogynist. The problem is, it's always sexist to do these things, just like there are things that people in the black community do that would be called racist if a white person did it, but somehow, they get away with it on a regular basis. I think in the case of gender roles, both society and biology tend to program boys that it's their duty to defend women, yet now we have women who not only don't want to be defended, they want to go on the attack. I suppose that's their prerogative, but there are still women who want all of the benefits of being protected without any of the obligations, it's all take-take, not give-take.

      As for Lake Placid, fantastic movie, Betty White's character was amazing, but you're right, there are plenty of places in popular culture where women slapping men is viewed, not only as normal, but used for comedic effect, as though it's to be expected, but when you turn the tables and show a man slapping a woman, except when she's hysterical, it's viewed as abuse and assault. If we're really going for gender equality, everyone has to be equal, one side can't have all the perks and then keep whining that they're not getting enough.

      Great ideas once again, I hope you keep reading!

  3. What you say about boys being programmed by biology to protect women is interesting , perhaps an inherited trait hard-wired into the genes from cave days when women needed manly muscle in fending off sabre tooth tigers? perhaps what you say could also explain why studies have shown that combined infantry combat teams of men and women ( Israel fielded the teams to test the combat efficiency) have yielded miserable results, it wasn't that the women weren't fighting , I do not really know if they did or not , but it was that when under fire , the male soldier was more concerned with protecting his female companion at arms than concentrate on his part of the fighting.

    The same study also showed that when the enemy was confronted with these mixed teams, they fought more viciously than they would have if they were up only against men…..apparently men still cannot stomach the idea of losing to a girl….a bit of contrast here isn't it? we are on the subject of men not reacting to being slapped by women , but somewhere else men don't willfully yield an inch when push comes to shove …..I guess you must be thinking cultural conditioning ?

    Lake Placid is a good watch , my fav scene was the last one where Betty White feeds the baby gators, as if they were ducklings …a bit chilling and cute at the same time …that was a grand scene.

    You have a fine blog here, I have been reading through some entries and they all exhibit the workmanship of a mind that is equitable and objective , it'll be a pleasure to read and contribute to the discussion when I can :).

    1. Undeniably, we do have biological drives, even though for the most part, we have the intellectual ability to override them if need be. I'm all in favor of equality, at least as far as we can go, but there are some biological differences between men and women that are not going to go away because we want them to, nor should we expect them to. What I object to are those who want all of the advantages and none of the disadvantages under the guise of equality. It's really only been in the past couple of years that I've heard larger numbers of women say they want front-line combat positions. I have still yet to hear any of them demanding draft cards. There are some who want to play on men's sports teams, yet whine loudly if a man wants to play on a women's team. There are a lot of gender roles programmed by society, but it seems like the feminists only want to eliminate the ones that benefit men over women, not the ones that benefit women over men.

      I'm glad you like the blog, I do my best. Unfortunately, I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place, most people who agree with me on religion, disagree with me on the political stuff and most people who agree with me on the political stuff, hate my stance on religion. I just can't win. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Optionally add an image (JPG only)