I don’t give a damn about the Olympics. I haven’t cared… ever. Honestly, I’m trying to think if I’ve ever even watched an event on purpose and I don’t think I have. Largely, this is because I don’t give a shit about sports, professional or otherwise. I find it mind-numbingly boring to sit and watch other people play a game on TV or run around a field throwing a ball at each other. Um… no thanks. Where’s the remote?
But damn, lots of people want us to know who is winning medals. I can’t take ten steps without someone filling me in on the latest Olympic news.
Oh, but aren’t you patriotic? Well no, not particularly, and what does patriotism have to do with the people competing? Being born within a national boundary doesn’t make you a better athlete. This is a competition between individuals, not between nations. I don’t care who wins and I certainly don’t care what country they originated from. Go play your games and leave me alone.
What’s worse is that the Olympics are bringing out the worst in people. There are hundreds of “brand enforcers” roaming London, looking for anyone infringing on the “brand”. If you have anything even remotely resembling the Olympic rings at your shop? Expect a cease and desist order. If your shop even sounds like “Olympic”, you’ll get a visit. Oh, and you can’t serve fries anywhere around London. McDonalds has the exclusive fast food rights and even serving similar food, even if you’ve served it for 50 years, gets you cited. Or the Boris Bike rental that has existed in central London for many years, you’re not allowed to ride them around because they’re not owned by an Olympic sponsor. They even control what you wear! If you wear branded clothing that’s not an official Olympic sponsor, they can arrest you and charge you with a criminal offense. For wearing the wrong brand of clothing!
Fuck London. Fuck the Olympics. Let me know when they’re over.
