Burn, Baby Burn! Baptist Inferno!
I suppose none of us ought to be especially surprised at this, but a church in North Carolina is planning on having a good old-fashioned book burning for Halloween at which they plan on burning all of “Satan’s books” including all non-KJV Bibles and the works of Mother Theresa, Rick Warren, Billy Graham and others.
The Amazing Grace Baptist Church in Canton, N.C. says the Bible supports their actions too. According to Acts 19:18-20: “And many that believed, came and confessed and shewed their deeds. Many of them also which used curious arts, brought their books together, and burned them before all men: and they counted the price of them, and found it fifty thousand pieces of silver. So mightily grew the word of God and prevailed.”
David Lynch, a resident of nearby Asheville, N.C., reports “it’s a little disconcerting how close this is to my home.” He also says “They are burning so much stuff I’ve dubbed them the hypocritical Christian Taliban, just the scope of all the information they want to destroy is pretty disturbing.”
In an interview with the local news station, ABC affiliate KMBT Channel 12, we see Pastor Marc Grizzard detailing their plans. Okay, now don’t get mad that I’m saying this but holy crap, you couldn’t get more redneck if you tried. I’m sure Pastor Grizzard drives a pickup with a gun rack and is married to his sister. I’m not sure how much more of a hick you could come up with, but it’s no wonder Grizzard and his 14-member congregation are so damn stupid. My apologies for the ad on the news story, I have no control over it.
Now don’t get me wrong, assuming these people own the books in question, I couldn’t care less what they do with them. They can read them, they can shred them, they can burn them, they can shove them up their asses and do a jig. It’s just the utter idiocy that they use as justification for their actions that gets me.
So if you’re anywhere around Canton, N.C. on Halloween night and you have a good supply of KJV Bibles, maybe you ought to run over to the Amazing Grace Baptist Church and set up your own little firepit on the first piece of public land you can find and have a nice little King James Barbecue. After all, free speech goes both ways. Maybe send them some Fried Phillipians or Marinated Matthew when you’re done. Couldn’t hurt.
2 Comments to “Burn, Baby Burn! Baptist Inferno!”
Actually, I'm kind of hoping they aren't. Evolution in action, when it works, it works.
These people are batshit insane. I hope they're smart enough not to set themselves alight when they stoke the fires next weekend.
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